We don't always ask for those stressful situations and people to come along and hang out with us. Rest assured we do have to find a way, on a regular basis, to handle it all though. If something tricky comes up, do you hold it all in, gloss over it, lose it, bite back, share with everyone but the person in question, or even hide? Are we aware of how we're handling things? You've probably noticed most people tend to default to a particular style to handle difficult situations.
Forget about everyone else for a couple of minutes. Are we actually aware of our own style of how we handle confrontation, difficult people or uncomfortable situations? We all know that the most beneficial way to handle any stress is to express yourself and get things off your chest in a timely fashion. Ooooh so easy to say, I hear you cry. Depending on how you handle things, this can be extremely tricky for most of us for fear of hurting others' feelings, being scared that your opinions aren't worthy enough, not wanting to rock the boat, but instead 'keep the peace', being scared you will become wound up and angry (or someone else will)...we have so many reasons NOT to express our feelings. We're not interested in one big monologual rant here (that's also damaging for both parties). I'm talking about taking stock of a situation and being aware there and then if you have important thought/s or feeling/s to express. This is AWARENESS and it takes practice!
You might not know (or even believe it), but the more you harbour hurt or ill-feelings or emotions - and SO OFTEN misunderstandings too - the more you yourself will suffer whether physically, mentally and/or emotionally. In parallel, exploding into rages can not only cause hurt for the recipient, as we know, but also cause havoc in your very own mind and body. Next time you find yourself in the aftermath of a stressful situation, notice how your under- or over-expressed emotions start to cause symptoms in your body, physically.
So what can we do to help us express ourselves more easily? Develop more SELF-AWARENESS. Through AcuEnergetics® and the practice of Meditation and Mindfulness, I have become much more self-aware. For me, it finely tuned my recognition of my strengths, weaknesses and habitual patterns holding me back. Don't get me wrong, I am nowhere near perfection (if only), I've only become more aware which has helped me discover strategies that make it all less stressful.
Everyone's different! For me, habits such as being overly self-critical, taking on far too much, striving for perfection and not taking a break, are my default settings that I continue to work with. Although I may have times when I'm worried; or engage in a lose - lose conversation, I now realise and come back far more easily to a place of stillness, reflection and clarity to work away through it - and most importantly let that stuff go.
Who wouldn't prefer to be mindful and more aware? I've recognised that developing gentle awareness prevents me causing myself quite so much harm - physically and emotionally. On the odd occasion I too get lost in moments of worry, frustration or guilt - and boy, 'shooting yourself in the foot' hurts! What do I mean?
I'm talking about the often default habit of leaving the mind and body to it and letting unguarded thoughts rule.
A quote from Buddha: Your worst enemy cannot harm you as much as your own unguarded thoughts.
AcuEnergetics® and meditation have also developed my awareness in other ways. I now recognise and admire emotional intelligence, good communication and articulation in others. Some people are just SO GOOD at saying how they feel or 'getting things off their chests'. Those who I truly admire actually manage this with respect and in a timely manner too! Wow!! Surely this is mutually beneficial to solve any tricky issue.
Why not start practising the gentle ART OF AWARENESS with the little niggly situtations first...